Net Authority!

 

I nominate myself to be part of Net Authority's database.  It's quite a simple task: all I need to do is break one of their Internet Acceptable Use Policy rules.

Even better, break all the rules at once.  So!  Let's go at it.

1. Thou shalt not post pornographic material.  Check.

2. Thou shalt not post hateful material.  Check.

3. Thou shalt not post blasphemous material.  Check.  I trust you all to know by now that I cuss like a fucking bastard.

4. Thou shalt not post materials of an offensive political nature.  Check.  By simply living in Canada, I defy pretty much every political system in existence, whichever person's in power at the moment is a complete piece of shit, American liberals accuse me of being a fucking republican, and American republicans accuse me of being a fucking liberal.

5. Thou shalt not post materials containing bestiality, including interracial relationships.  Check.  I didn't have anything of the sort on hand, so I googled for two persons of different color, shamelessly ripped off the first pic I came across, and uploaded it:

And there we go!  Now I'm ready to get banned from the Internet.